Saturday, April 22, 2006

Any takers?

My blog is worth $6,209.94.
How much is your blog worth?

Friday, April 21, 2006

Who do you call when the Attorney General admits to Kiddie Porn?

Alberto Gonzales, the Attorney General of the United States, said in a CNN article:

"I have seen pictures of older men forcing naked young girls to have anal sex," Gonzales said. "There are videos on the Internet of very young daughters forced to have intercourse and oral sex with their fathers."


Isn't possession of kiddie porn a crime? Is he telling us the government has a collection of kiddie porn? Has he had his minions collect the computers on which he viewed this porn on confiscated?

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Thanks to some advice from a co-worker, I checked my retirement account and discovered I had a whole lot more in there than I thought. (My retirement account philosophy is set it up and forget you have it.) I decided to withdraw $10,000 from my retirement and do two things: 1)Do some minor repairs on my vehicle, 2)pay off as many credit cards as I can. I know that I will pay off Discover Card. They've been a little obnoxious lately.

I got a call last week from discover, four days after agreeing to pay $191, which was half my payment due May 8, but $50 less that my past due account. When they called to get the other $190, I told them that there was no way I could guarantee that I could pay them by the 8th. So the girlie gave me two options: pay the $51 over the phone now, or set up a payment of $191 for the 8th. I explained again about paydays and empty bank accounts, and told her the story about breaking my leg with no insurance. She clicked her tongue and said she understood and would put me in touch with credit assistance.

I'm thinking, this will go well, when Mr. I'm-smarter-than-you comes on the phone and says that he has some options for me. First her explains that if I don't make a payment it will be reported to the credit bureau. I stopped him and said I have already been told that. Get to the options. "I'm just doing my job, sir." Fine, but don't repeat what I've already been told. I've been to school. I know what the credit bureau is and what it does. "Okay, well, you can pay the $50 today to bring your current. . ." he says. "Can't do it. Empty checking account." "Okay. Then we can set up a payment for $190 on May 8th." "I already told the girlie that I can't promise anything. I'm two months behind on three cards, and guess what: They ALL want their money now! I paid you guys on Friday, so that puts you at the bottom of the list." Apparently, Discover pays its collection agents really well, because in their world they've never earmarked the whole next paycheck to pay some bills. Anyway, for ten minutes he repeats the same two options over and over again, I keep explaining about owing $30,000 to more than just Discover, until I lose my temper. "Fine, I will set up a f**king payment of $50 for the 21st. That's when I get paid again." "Sir, I don't appreciate that kind of language." "I don't appreciate being talked down to."

So I withdrew ten grand and am gonna pay off Discover and as many other cards as I can. I won't get them all, but at least I should be able to free up about $400 a month to pay to the other cards.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Did you see this report of the San Francisco Quake centennial celebration?:

There were eleven quake survivors, none under 100 years old.

See? They're writing down to us again.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Hate crimes are the vilest evil inflicted on us by the Clinton Administration. I don't mean Bill and Hill committed hate crimes, but they're "I feel your pain" empathy lead to the passage of Federal hate crime laws. I saw that if I come over to your house, beat you bloody with a baseball bat, and burn your house down, I should be punished the same no matter the color of our skins or how we orgasm. However, since I am pasty white no matter how much sun I absorb, and if you were black, my sentence would be doubled. If you were gay, Dear Lord! there would be no end to the punishment inflicted upon me.

I have already written about hate crimes and how wrong they are. I wish I could find a link to that article so you could re-read it here.

Maybe I don't have to. A recently enacted anti-bullying law in Florida is drawing criticism because minorities aren't protected. So let me get this straight: If a kid demands lunch money from all the white kids he's just a bully. If he demands lunch money from all the white kids and a black kid he's worse? This is exactly why hate crimes are stupid laws. What about when a black bullies a white? What about when a Hispanic bullies an asian? Is the severity of the punishment inversely proportional to the lightness of the skin color of the bully?

I can see the scene in the Pricipal's office: "Well, Jimmy, you can be glad that Skippy is white. You'll only get a day's detention. If he'd been a female minority, you'ld be on your way to 'pound me in the ass' prison now."

Here's an idea: Why don't we simply not tolerate any bullying?

Sunday, April 16, 2006

The Answers to 10 Science Questions every Christian should know

1. What percentage of the earth is covered by water?

71%, This is not Bible based, but mathematically based, therefore not a fact, but a theory.

2. What sorts of signals does the brain use to communicate sensations, thoughts and actions?


3. Did dinosaurs and humans ever exist at the same time?

Since dinosaurs, like domestic cats, are not mentioned in the Bible, no.

4. What is Darwin's theory of the origin of species?


5. Why does a year consist of 365 days, and a day of 24 hours?

The number of days is not mentioned in the Bible, and is therefore a creation of Man, and is therefore a theory. It takes 24 hours for the sun to orbit the Earth.

6. Why is the sky blue?

It's God's favorite color.

7. What causes a rainbow?

God. It's his promise to flood the Earth again. Unless there's Global Warming.

8. What is it that makes diseases caused by viruses and bacteria hard to treat?

They are the work of Satan, and only God can defeat Satan.

9. How old are the oldest fossils on earth?

6000 years.

10. Why do we put salt on sidewalks when it snows?

Man developed this theory that salt lowers the freezing point of water, melting ice. Since the exact mechanics are not mentioned in the Bible, it is not a fact.

Extra credit: What makes the seasons change?


No wonder they want this stuff taught in schools. It's pretty easy!

With apologies to the original article.