Friday, November 11, 2005

Now that the French riots have been held over for a second week, I have to ask: Do the French rioters loot their Wal-Marts, or it is just an American thing?

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Some days I wake up and wonder how people manage to remember how to breathe in the morning.

This week, the local police arrested a 23 year old man for arranging a meeting with what he thought was a 13-year-old girl.

Apparently, this guy hasn't been watching the news. Every night, there's a story about someone who gets arrested for arranging to have sex with a minor, only to realize, waay too late, that it was a sting.

So, as a public service for all you pedophiles out there, I want you tell you something:

There are no 13-year-olds on the Internet waiting to have sex with 40 year-old men! There are, however, hordes of cops waiting to arrest 40 year-old men who want to have sex with 13-year-old girls! Here's what your "13-year-old honey" looks like:

Imagine the scene: You saunter into the local Mooby's to meet your 13-year-old playmate. You seat yourself at the appointed table, and suddenly, dozens of police cars squeal into the parking lot, the cashier leaps across the counter like Luke Duke across the hood of the General Lee, and the people at all the other tables stand, draw their guns and all yell "FREEZE, DIRTBAG!"

You want to fantasize about having sex with a 13-year-old? Fine! Keep it in your head! Today, thoughts aren't a crime. This, however, is subject to change. Watch this space.

The flag of Jesusistan

The citizens of the State of Texas have approved a constitutional ban on same sex marriages. I've heard all the arguments: it will bankrupt the insurance industry if two gays marry; it's against biblical law; it's de sanctifies marriage; yada yada yada.

Tell me, how has marriage been sanctified by us straights? Half of all marriages end in divorce. What's so special about marriage? It's something you can undo if you don't like it.

If you are so concerned about the institution of marriage being destroyed, maybe you ought to get to work on a ban on divorce!

Just to show you how we breeders value the sactity of marriage, in New Jersey, Senator John Corzine was running for governor. His ex-wife (they divorced in 2002 after 33 years of marriage) campaigned against him and for his opponant. She was featured in TV commercials this week saying Corzine "let his family down and he'll probably let New Jersey down, too." On Good Morning America yesterday, they mentioned another race, I can't remember which state, where the ex-wife of a candidate called in an endorsement of the opponant: "He's against Black women. He left me for a White woman."

Personally, I agree with Kinky Friedman who said, “They have the right to be just as miserable as the rest of us!”

As far as the insurance thing goes, I'd marry for insurance. I don't have any, and now I owe $11,675 for a broken ankle.

Monday, November 07, 2005

Why is it that the proponants of Intelligent Design cannot beleive that God, Jehovah, Allah, or the creator of your choice, is not powerful enough to create Evolution? Is their creator not smart enough? Or is their creator trying to dumb it down for us? Nor does S/He have enough patience to wait millions or billions of years. S/He can only act in periods of thousands of years, despite the fact that S/He has existed forever. Apparently, until 6000 years ago, their God was a lazy God.

The Vatican, ironically enough, has suggested that we should listen to science, if only to understand the natural world.

Back in the days of Galileo and Copernicus, the Catholic church allowed the model of a heliocentric solar system, which goes against the literal word of the Bible:

ECCLESIASTES 1:4-7
4 One generation passeth away...cometh, but the earth abideth for ever.
5 The sun also ariseth...goeth down
6 The wind goeth...returneth
7 All the rivers run...return again.

Genesis 15:12,17 - “And when the sun was going down” and “when the sun went down.” Psalms 104:19: “the sun knoweth his going down.”

1.Chronicles 16:30 "Fear before him, all the earth: the world also shall be stable, that it be not moved."

My theory is that the more we learn about the natural world the greater God, Allah, or the Flying Spaghetti Monster is for creating something so complex. I think it's the height of Human arrogance to make God appear stupid, backward and limited.

And, ladies, remember: If you beleive in the literal truth of the Bible; that it can never be untrue and can never change, you have to accept Genesis 3:16, 4:19, 21:10; Exodus 21:7; Leviticus 12:1-5; and Deuteronomy 21:10-13. Women are the property of men. They cannot own property. They are worth less than men. That is Biblical truth!

The only man more evil than President Bush is Robbie Gould. (Click on his name to see the face of Evil in Chicago). This man took it upon himself to crush the self-esteem of the New Orleans Saints. With 22 seconds left in the game, he decided not to miss the field goal that gave the Chicago Bears the game.

It is obvious that Bush's tentacles reach deep inside the NFL. Why aren't more people outraged that the homeless Saints are being taken advantage of? We shall not rest until the Saints are presented with the Lombardi Trophy for Super Bowl LX!

We shall overcome
We shall overcome
We shall overcome some day

Oh deep in my heart
I do believe
We shall overcome some day

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Not satisfied that the suppliers of their products are making record profits, Arizona gas stations are cashing in as well.

Back when I worked in a gasoline company's convenience store, they lost money on the gas to make money on the sodas. Thank "Jebus H. christ" they've decided to go with the 75% markup on gas, too.