Saturday, October 15, 2005

A scene from The Entellus Dilemma!

Back in 1980, I wrote a Star Trek fan story called "The Entellus Dilemma." It was about Romulans taking over the Enterprise. It was published in a fanzine called R&R in 1981. I finally found the box my copy of the zine was in, and have finished scanning and editing the story. It took two whole days, and I am sick of typing!

Friday, October 14, 2005

Lou Grant, the bastion of Media Honesty

The Mainstream Media lied once again!

Remember me informing you that no one was murdered at the Superdome, that it was, not to put too fine a point on it, fiction? Remember how the media heard the rumors then reported them as factual without of confirming their information? That wasn't the only thing that wasn't true.

This week's issue of the American Chemical Society's journal Environmental Science & Technology, reports its analysis of New Orleans flood water. They discovered that the toxic flood waters reported all over the media were about as dangerous as the city's normal storm water runoff, but with a bit more salt than normal.

Once more, the MSM breathlessly gave false information to the public. It's like everything has to be a crisis of all new proportions. Remember, there are three things you can't trust in life: the government, the media, and the boy picking up your daughter for a date.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Porn - The New Axis of Evil!

Tuesday night, on The Adam Corolla Project, Adam, while buying shoes for his buddy, mentioned that Americans have their priorities all screwed up. We'll hapilly sit there and watch Fear Factor, where people eat the most disgusting things and then throw up, but show us a tittie and we have Congressional hearings. I LMAO at that observation, and thought no more about it.

Then I ran across this news story. "Tucked deep inside a massive bill designed to track sex offenders and prevent children from being victimized by sex crimes is language that could put many Hollywood movies in the same category as hard-core, X-rated films. The provision added to the Children's Safety Act of 2005 would require any film, TV show or digital image that contains a sex scene to come under the same government filing requirements that adult films must meet," the story begins. However, the language is so vague, we learn, that many TV shows and movies produced before 1995, when the law retroactively takes effect, will be considered pornography and fall under the provisions of the record-keeping requirement is known as Section 2257.

According to Ernie Stewert over at EHOWA, the provision would, essential, classify any pornographic material as child pornography unless proof of age is on file. Ernie's analysis of the new rules is interesting reading, and, if accurate, is Napoleonic. All porn is Child Porn unles the 2257 has been filed.

Now, however, Rep. Mike Pence (R-Ind.) has snuck an amendment into the child protection act that is so vaguely worded that pretend sex acts, even when the actors are clothed, could fall under this law, requiring so much paperwork, that it would be easier to cut the scene.

On September 21, the FBI announced a new, all-out attack against porn. (I keep hoping the repition of porn will get my hits up!) After all, it's worked so hard against bin Laden. As a result of our victory in the War Against Terror™, we are pulling agents from their terrorism duties to "divert eight agents, a supervisor and assorted support staff to gather evidence against 'manufacturers and purveyors' of pornography — not the kind exploiting children, but the kind that depicts, and is marketed to, consenting adults."

That's right! They are gathering evidence against legal porn.

Back in the 90s, Republicans objected to some photos by Robert Maplethorpe. Rush Limbaugh, in particular, objected to a photo of bullwhip handle inserted in Maplethorpe's anus. Thank goodness it wasn't a penis, huh? Seriously, though: a bullwhip in an anus is art and a penis in an anus in porn?

Before you gloat that this is what happens when we elect Republicans, imagine what would happen if Hillary were to run for President on the platform on repealing the Porn laws.

We can add Freedom of Speech to the list of proscribed activities, which includes Freedom of Religion (we must inform the unwashed in schools that some people beleive God Dun It!™). They have already used the Patriot Act to close adult book stores in some states.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

I'm your attorney, Lionel B. Landshark.

The feeding frenzy has started. Lawyers are starting to circle New Orleans looking for people with deep pockets to sue for Hurricane Katrina. Surprisingly, Bush and FEMA aren't on the list.

Daniel Becnel Jr. has filed a Class Action placeholder suit to assign blame for the failure of the 17th Street Canal levee wall, initially naming Boh Bros. Construction Co. of New Orleans and a small Florida construction company as defendants. In a class action, lawyers file suit on behalf of a group of individuals who are representative of those injured by an action. Such suits ask the court to include all others who are similarly affected. Note that Becnal doesn't have a client. He's just suing, and will add clients later.

Nice to see that the legal profession doing this work out of the goodness of their hearts. Oh yeah, and the 50-70% they're gonna take from the victims, er I mean clients, as tribute.

Tuesday, October 11, 2005


If you are tired of giving money to human beings for their self-inflicted misfortunes (They decided to live on the Gulf Coast, or earthquake prone regions, after all. And it is humanity's fault that everything in Nature is threatened.), I have come across an organization desperately in need of assistance.

The Pacific Northwest Tree Octopus faces extinction as a result of Man's thoughtless actions. To prevent their extinction, give from the heart. Tell 'em Life in the Banana Patch, the NEW Home of Compassion on the Web™ ©, sent you.

Monday, October 10, 2005

The Hate Continues

The only remaining area of American life where ability determines outcome is sports. I know, I know. It's shameful. But the egalitarian welfare ideals of modern American society, where one's outcomes are unrelated to one's inputs, have yet to take hold in sports, much to our shame.

Witness the New Orleans Saints.

Their home, almost destroyed during Hurricane Katrina, is unsuitable for use earning a living. They are left wandering the countryside playing their games wherever they can, without support from their fans. While other Katrina victims have received Red Cross debit cards, the Saints received nothing. Such an uneven playing field, no pun intended, must be corrected. The Saints must be declared Super Bowl XL champions. If we had a Democrat in the White House, it would have already been done. But this corporation-loving administration doesn't care about the suffering of its citizens, especially its citizens of color! (Black & Gold, in this case.)

The only people with a greater contempt for the Victims of Katrina™ are the Green Bay Packers. Imagine the hatred of an 0-4 team that compels them to work to deprive the Saints of a victory. It's wrong, I tell you,WRONG!

Demand Justice for the Saints!

(Yes, Jill, I know the Saints aren't a very good team. And yes, the Texans suck worse.)

Sunday, October 09, 2005

I ran across this idea on Fark. It's called The Four Hour Rule. Applying the rule makes you appear super dedicated to your job. That's all important in today's corporate driven world.

First thing in the morning, call your boss and tell them you won't be coming to work that day. Then show up at noon to demonstrate your commitment to your job!