I eagerly await the first lawsuit from one of the citizens of New Orleans who ignored the mandatory evacuation of their city. The lawsuit, of course, will be on the grounds that the city did not do enough to make them leave when they were convinced they could ride the storm out. I know the suit is coming, because we have people standing in front of the convention center, dodging small arms fire aimed at the rescue helicopters, wanting to know why no one is helping them.

Remember the McDonald's coffee lawsuit? McDonalds was held liable when a woman took the lid off her coffee to add sugar and cream, spilled her coffee. (Please not that on every page portraying the facts of the case, the cup tipped over. She didn't spill it. It just tipped. Or at the very least, the action is in the passive voice, "the contents spilled on her," implying, of course, no fault on her part.) The woman suffered severe burns over 6% of her body and only sued Mickey D's when they refused to pay her medical bills. Notice that she did not sue the car manufacturer for not making a flat seat...

In Rochester, NH, a woman is in the process of suing her doctor because she said she was obese and could only get healthier by losing weight.

I broke my ankle on the city's golf course. I was walking down and slight slope when my left foot slipped, and my right toe caught on the turf. Following the examples above, I should sue the city, right? I should make my fellow citizens pay for my medical care, and for the time away from work.

Personally, I blame bush. If he weren't so distracted by the war in Iraq, he could have prevented my accident.